Probably not the wisest thing to do on a blog but I'm going personal here. Many of the people who read my blog are Grandparents, so if nothing else, may understand.
My oldest daughter is newly 22, 8 months pregnant with her third child (oldest is 2 1/2) and is an alcoholic. She didn't drink with the other two but has steadily with this one. She has been lying to me about it (they live with me) for 8 months when I have confronted her many times asking her if she was pregnant. The reason she hasn't admitted it? Apparently, it's none of my business!! Oh, and she is giving the baby up...she doesn't care who gets him, doesn't want to see him or keep up with him after he is born.
My older two grand children have lived here their entire lives and I adore them, naturally. I am currently doing the hardest thing I've ever had to do and that is telling my daughter that if this baby is none of my business, then neither is her having a place to stay. She is throwing MY Grandson away like a used tampon, drinking like a fish while pregnant with him and lying to everyone. My babies that I have had with me since birth are probably going to be taken away from me and there is not a damn thing I can do about it.
Never in my wildest dreams did I ever envision this happening. This was my "good" daughter. The one who never missed school and who (up until she met the kids dad) dated guys I could at least tolerate. My Grand kids are the joy of my life. I have housed them and fed them since they were born and their own mother is treating me like this! Forget how she is treating me...she may be killing her own child! Grandparents should have more rights, children should be able to stay with biological grandparents if able. (I am only 48) Parental rights should only go so far as protecting parents who have proven capable of making good judgment calls in the past. Drinking while pregnant is not a good judgment call.
So today I confronted her and she left...with the grand babies. Probably getting drunk. I feel like my heart is on the floor, open and oozing and she is running around pouring alcohol on the knife. So, the woman who is usually cheerful, usually witty; instead is broken hearted and feels helpless. I don't want to lost my babies.
Vee, all I can say is that I'm offering up prayers on your behalf. I believe God loves those children even more than you, and he knows what makes them tick. Alcoholism is a horrible wedge in a family. Do you think your daughter would seek help?
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry.
I am so sorry to hear that you're going through such a traumatic twist of fate right now, Veronica.. Why don't you look on Yahoo Groups for a group called "Virginia Grands" ... the group owner knows me (Linda from FightCPS.Com) ... you can tell them I gave you the link: Virginia Grands
ReplyDeleteOh, Veronica, that is sad news. You all are definitely in a tough place. Try every avenue to get the babies back home. Out there with a drunken mom is no place for them to be. I pray that this situation will end and broken hearts can be restored.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry to hear what you're going through. I agree that grandparents should have more rights. I don't know what to say other than I truly hope this all gets better before it gets worse. Hugs to you, many many hugs.
ReplyDeleteWhat a nightmare! My prayers are certainly with you! I agree. Grandparents should have more legal rights. Have you talked to an attorney? In our area there are attorneys who offer their services for free if needed. Do you have access to that kind of service? Can you apply to adopt the children? Your daughter certainly does not seem to be in any condition to care for the children. There has to be a solution. I wish I knew how to help!
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